One thing at a time

Patience has never been my strong suit.

That's a trait of Guilbot men, I've observed. I like my problems fixed, fixed now, and fixed clean, dammit. I'm with that Microsoft exec who had the sign on his desk: "Decisions in ten minutes or less, or the next one's free."

So, it has been torture, absolute friggin' torture for me to go around and around in my own head about

• stay on our half-acre plot of land and remodel our cool modern house, OR buy/build a house;
• move to L.A. OR stay in Austin;
• pursue an acting career full-time, OR do it part-time;
• keep working a boring corporate gig, OR devote a lot of time and energy to being an author and speaker (or actor);
• what is success? a comfortable middle-class existence, or financial freedom via crazy dedication to a goal?

I still haven't figured it out, but now there is a happy new variable in play. More on that later...

But what I have figured out is that the answer is not likely to be clean and easy. It's going to be messy and hard. Not like, climb to the top of the mountain, obtain the wisdom of a guru, execute said wisdom. More like throw a bunch of spaghetti at the wall, and see what sticks.

Looking back at my life, I have realized some things:

• I bounce back from poverty pretty darn well.
• I don't suffer fools easily.
• I like relatively short-term projects with a sense of accomplishment at the end. I get bored easily.
• I have a lot of interests, a fair amount of talents, and can make money in many different ways.
• I have made the most money as a consultant in the corporate world, getting paid in relation to some big information technology (IT) project.
• I have made a LOT more money as an actor than as a musician, and in a much shorter time.
• I seem to have a natural talent and affinity for writing and for performing- acting and public speaking in particular.
• I like the lifestyle and control of an author better than that of an actor or consultant.
• The incongruity of making money at one thing while aspiring to do something else full-time bugs the crap out of me.
• I dislike being poor.
• I am not very patient.

So these are clues, anyway, to point me in the right direction.

And direction is really the key. Once I have decided what target I'm aiming for, all the rest follows suit. But maybe instead of a nice, clear bulls-eye, I will, for now, have to settle for a general direction. In the words of Captain Kirk, "Out there. That-a-way."

I'll keep you posted.